Last Thread of SoccerMomDom

there she goes

Last week Alex the Eldest took off for Denver to begin her life. Degree in hand, she'll be working at a swanky restaurant and freelancing her way into a journalism career. These are exciting times for her as Doug and I navigate our new parental role. Doug seemed to understand his responsibilities immediately. First things first: Get her off our car insurance. I felt a bit more unclear of my role. Could I still advise her how to dress? (As if she'd listen.) Should we be there to help her assemble her new IKEA furniture? Do we send all of her belongings to the new address? Or should we leave those few remnants of her youth to allow us some tearful nostalgic binges? These are important questions.

This week Cole the Youngest turned 18. In theory, he's an adult. In theory. He continues to live his life according to principles posited from the Marvel Universe. (Not the worst thing... "with great power comes great responsibility...") The only thing that really concerns me about Cole's age is the draft requirement. And getting into college. And sports injuries. And his focus on girls. Okay, so there are a few things that make me as nervous as a cup of coffee. Luckily for Cole, Alex is 600 miles away, so I can really help him through just about any matter in his life that I think he needs help with. Also, luckily for

Making a cupcake/college decision.
I don't dare show the actual video.

Cole, his father won't always let me do that. Damn, my hubby's too wise at times.

Doug and I had our 25th wedding anniversary this week. We didn't have to worry about the kids throwing us a silver-themed party. They hardly remembered to text! That's okay. I clearly remember the self-absorption of a young adult. Trying to understand your place in the world. Blending your skill with your passions. Narrowing down your passions! And of course, getting paid.

Cole's just really getting his feet wet in this way. He has a year to figure out where he wants to go to college and what he wants to major in. My purpose is clear here.  (Get into U of Iowa and become a doctor! Duh!) But what about my 22-year-old? I'm actually beginning to realize Alex still needs me. I've fielded a few amusing calls. She's a smart girl, but the W4 has her befuddled. And she's already lost her debit card once. And what pharmacy can she use? And her box spring will definitely not fit in the new place. I love it. Sure, the issues seem kind of trivial. But every time I see Alex's name pop up on my phone, I feel a wave of happiness. My time as a soccer mom might be fading, but my time as just a good ole' mom, always here, is as vivid as ever.

Wonder

Does anyone remember the song, Wonder by Natalie Merchant? It came out either in 96 or 97? After Alex was born in June of 1997, the song became our theme as I cried and rocked the baby to sleep while Natalie sang how her baby was one of the wonders of the world. Eventually my raging pregnancy hormones eked back down to normal levels (arguably, anyway) and I could listen to the song without a tear dripping.

Anyway, I just had a wondrous day with my mother at the ICAN Women’s Conference in Omaha. Rubi J Organic Clothing made their first appearance and drew a wonderful crowd to our booth! We met many enthusiastic mothers, grandmothers, and aunties…one particular mother left on impression on me that I won’t soon forget. She asked if we had any onesies in the size of 2 or 3 T. Unfortunately, the largest onesie size we carry is 12-18 months. Then she explained why she wanted that size.

She wanted to hide a contraption that her son had to wear on his hip. “Dane,” has a rare brain disease. His brain has not grown larger than that of a two-year old. He doesn’t have the ability to hold his head up, nor does will he be able to walk or use his hands functionally. This beaming mother told us that her son wasn’t expected to live past six months after he was born. Miraculously, he is now over three years old. Dane’s mother only spoke of the blessing he has brought her and her husband.

So I devote this posting only to express the blessing I feel for my children tonight. No complaints on their behavior. No gimmicky topic. I just want the world to know that Doug and I love Alex and Cole more than anything in the world. The are truly the wonders in our lives.

Taking Alex to the Movies

I'm excited. Alex seems to like me again. She has always loved me, but something has changed within the last couple of weeks. Like, she's asking me, like, what should she wear with this shirt, or like, what shoes go best with this outfit. AND, the other day she even asked, like, what my favorite movie was when I was a kid. (I'm a female born in 1969, so obviously my favorite was Grease.)

Anyway, just as I thought we had made it through those rocky, independent years between the age of six and nine, she threw me a curve ball.

"Mom? Are you and Dad gonna, like, going to the same movie as Lexi and me?"

"What? Of course!"

She sighs. "Like, Drillbit Taylor is showing in the other theater though With Owen Wilson."

"So. Nim's Island looks good to me!"

Another sigh.

Sensing my daughter's discontent with my response, I accomodate her. "I tell you what. Dad and I won't sit by you and Lex."

She accepts the terms.

As soon as she and Lexi receive their concessions, and before we receive ours, they shoot off into the theatre to secure prime 2nd row seats among their other friends. I spy an opening in the third row, directly behind her! Perfect.

"Ugh! Oh, Mom. You are,like, so lame." She didn't quite get the joke, I guess. So, I am sent back to my husband who looks quite comfortable in the assigned parents' section. "We're getting old, Hon."

"Yep," he states happily devouring the buttered popcorn.

But I'm a bit saddened. Watching the kids' expressions was as much fun as watching the movie. Well, at least I shouldn't miss any lines in the movie. Or have to take a potty break. Maybe.

But guess what? I can still hear her cute little laugh. Even from the parents' section. It makes me happy. No matter how old she is, her laugh makes me happy.