Rated What?

If there is one area that I have failed as a parent, it's preventing our children from seeing or hearing inappropriate songs, movies, videos and words. Case in point...

As many of you know, Cole loves Nickelback. One day, a few months after Christmas, I looked at the song list of Nickelback's Dark Horse CD he received from SANTA CLAUS. Just the name of some of the songs made me quiver. Now, I like Nickelback, from a musical perspective. But I don't love their platform. I prayed that Cole didn't understand or comprehend the lyrics. Then, the other day at breakfast...

"Mom, I hate to tell you this. But you know the song called Something in Your Mouth?"

"Yes." I don't like where this conversation is going.

"Well, I know what it means. You're not going to like it."

Oh, geez. What do I say? I fumble and come up with this. "Oh, really? Does it mean like when a boy and girl kiss and sometimes their tongues touch?"

Cole furrows his brows and gives me a quizzical look before replying, "Gross. No! It just means that a boy really likes a girl. You know, and he wants to call her."

I'm so glad I gave him the tongue image. Nice.

So, tonight, we're eating at a family restaurant and Cole blurts out, "I know what the C-Word is."

I'm dumbfounded. Do I lead him down a wretched path, explaining what the C-word represents? How all women find it offensive? How he should never, never repeat this word? Luckily, I'm not given the chance before my hubby steps in.

"Cole -- enough. We don't talk about that stuff."

End of conversation. Boy, that was easy. Morale of the story? Since Parental Guidance would be suggested every time I open my mouth, I'll just attempt to keep it shut to protect my children's innocent ears.